‘I told her that the cat stays. This is my home. You don’t get to walk in and decide who lives here’: Mother-in-law tries to evict couple’s cat after arriving uninvited for “holiday,” gets shut down, and leaves with her tail between her legs

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  • MIL came for a surprise holiday and demanded I get rid of my cat.

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  • I'm 38, a structural engineer, and I live with my husband and our cat. My MIL showed up unannounced this weekend, on Friday with her suitcase, calling it a holiday.
  • She's always hated that I have a cat but this scenario was unexpected. My MIL can't stop visiting unexpectedly/ uninvited.
  • She compared my cat to termites, mold, even said If you let an animal wreck your own home, how can anyone trust you to build safe structures?
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  • I've worked over decades to build my career, and she reduced all of it to an insult over my cat, a pet.
  • Yesterday night she gave me an ultimatum, that It's either me or the cat. If you care about this family, you'll prove it by getting rid of it..
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  • Those where her exact words. I told her that the cat stays. This is my home.
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  • You don't get to walk in and decide who lives here. She screamed that I always need control and locked herself in the guest room.
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  • This morning, she left without saying a word. My husband is stuck in the middle, and I can't get past the grudge.
  • It wasn't just her dislike of the cat but it was her trying to tear down my work, my stability, my sense of family.
  • She just shows up to someone else's house and thinks they can evict their pet?
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  • Say-What-KB How is your husband “stuck in the middle"? He should be setting the boundaries with his mom and standing up for his wife!
  • OP GleeFroth He says I should have responded to her gently than I did.
  • dodgerecharger NTA. But your husband needs to grow a spine. His mother is a guest in your home and he should give her some boundaries (No more unanounced visits)
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  • OP GleeFroth That was exactly what I thought! Her dislike for cats should be in her home, and not mind.
  • redskyatnight2162 Exactly. OP's husband needs to stand up for her and set firm boundaries. He's not stuck, he's a coward.
  • NJMomofFor She left, you win!! Next time she visits, go borrow a few cats. She will leave faster!! Tell your husband to grow a pair.
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  • BunnySlayer64 Exactly this. Cat lives with you. MIL does not. Leaving in a huff? You win! But your husband really needs to step up. Cat aside, MOL has no business disrespecting your hard work and career success. And her cat analogy? is there any ligic?
  • GalianoGirl Your husband is not stuck in the middle. He has zero spine. He needs to set some boundaries or go home to his Mommy. Nobody gets to just show up with a suitcase. Do not let her in the door. She will stop showing up uninvited it'll she is not allowed through the door. Your spineless husband should have escorted her out the door when she insulted you.
  • LeaveAny Your husband isn't "STUCK" in the middle. If he says he is, he's wrong. His mom is making him choose between her and you and he needs to know which side he is on-firmly. If he doesn't-then choose the cat over the man too.
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  • ChampionshipSad 1586 Good riddance. I hope she never returns
  • Marquar234 Why are you letting her stay there when she shows up uninvited?
  • Mazresk Husband is not stuck in the middle. He knows the right decision, but doesn't want to argue with momma. Next time she wants to visit he has to tell her to find a hotel.
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